Dear 14 Year Old Me...

Am I the only one who feels at least half a decade younger than my passport says?

I used to roll my eyes at the grown ups, complaining how fast time goes and that it's June already.. But seriously guys, IT'S JUNE ALREADY!!!?!

Where did the time go!? (Another classic tell tale line of age)

However, although I may feel like an uber cool teenager, totally down with the kids, if I think about it I really have grown from that hormonal, naive little thing. (Not literally, of course. What a waste of 'you'll grow into it' outfits..)

Here's a few words to Me, circa 2005.

1. Most grown ups don't have a clue what they're doing or what they want to do with their life. They're blagging it, just play along.

2. Don't make too many plans for your future, they never work out. 

3. You have the rest of your life to get too drunk. At least save it til you can afford nicer alcohol than a VK. 

4. Mum and Dad are actually pretty cool people. Seriously. Be nicer.

5.. Typyn lyk diz iz horribl. EUUURRGGHHHH STOOOOOOOPPPP.

6. No matter how many times you etch a name into your schoolbooks, surrounded by a gazillion hearts and 4EVAZ and IDST's.. You are not meant to be. But this is a good thing, trust me. 

7. Jane Norman clothes are not a good look.

 ii)Von Dutch hats are not a good look. 

iii) Having your hair up with one little strand pulled forward is not a good look.

8. Get yourself some interests. 'Watching TV' isn't the ideal filler to the activities part of a CV. Neither is MSN for that matter.

(Although, all those crazy symbols in your msn name that made it impossible to read your deeply profound lyric of choice may be exaggerated into 'excellent IT skills at a later date.)

9. Be careful what you put on Facebook. One day, your entire extended family will be on it (HEY GRANDMA!) so you may want to re-think that outfit choice to next week's social..

ii) I know you don't know what Facebook really is yet, but the sooner you ditch Bebo and get yourself on Facebook, the closer to a trendsetter you become.

10. Being a grown up is kind of the same as being a kid, except you just have to pay for everything. Enjoy your tax-free pocket money

And here's a little treat for you for making it through the whole post.. ENJOY 14 YEAR OLD BECKY!

What would you say to your former self?

brb just gonna go hide as far away from this image as poss.
xxx

How You Know You're Actually Becoming A Grown Up.

I believe I may be in a quarter-life crisis. In the famous words of Brtiney Spears..

I feel ya Britney. I used to think I had the answers to everything too..

Unfortunately, there's no adult enrolment ceremony so I think we have to make up our own rules. Here's my take on life's secret rites of passage to becoming a grown up.

You greet people with a kiss/handshake.
Is it one cheek? Both cheeks? Handshake? Half hug hand shake? OH MY GOD THEY'RE CENTIMETRES AWAY FROM MY FACE AND I CAN'T DECIDE. What happened to a good old fashioned wave?! I think we should adopt the Japanese bow. No tough on the spot decisions to make - and bonus! less germs.

You go out for a drink.
Not even out out. Just a drink, then bed at a sensible hour.

When you do go out out at home, you see your little sister's ex-boyfriends younger cousins.

And you feel old and gross.

You finally understand your parents despair at lights left on.

It's like bloody Blackpool illuminations here!

You have come in from a long day and thought 'Oh God, I need a drink!"

Seein fings written lyk dis makes u die a lil bit inside.
URRRRGGGHHHH. I'll give you a minute to shake that one off.

You no longer have sugar in your tea.
I still have sugar in my tea (one please) and I cling to this to justify my existence as a non-adult.

And if all this isn't enough to catapult you into a quarter life crisis - remember this GROWN UP shows about GROWN UPS and their GROWN UP problems?


Well you're almost the same age as Rachel (24) when she stumbled into everyone's favourite coffee shop on that fateful day..



Sorry!